Made with Xara This month I'd like to talk cheese: tasty, tantalising, trowels full of coagulated milk. Not namby-pamby cocktail sticks with barely a tongue tickler and a complimentary pineapple chunk but a full on barge load of the stuff. I like it and no buffet is complete without it. Top of the list is Stilton, for me the king of all things cheese. A tangy, bitter, blue veined heart attack in a wedge, and best of all the stench is great for masking the rancid odour of my decomposing feet after a major foot slog. Stilton is best served at room temperature so as to unleash the full arsenal of flavours this howitzer of a cheese possesses. With my Stilton I like a bit of Farmhouse Cheddar, matured to perfection and grated through an old sock. Farmhouse Cheddar is a little less pungent than I like but no less flavoursome; even with this lack of odour. Served up with raw onions and boiled eggs Farmhouse Cheddar really is a match for any flavour of Tic-Tacs. And finally Vieux Boulogne, the world's smelliest cheese from those French stink masters. Typically Gaelic, its creamy softness belies the fact it is oh so whiffy. I often keep a large wedge under the toilet mat for a midnight snack or a foot rub. That is it for now as I am off in search of the perfect pork pie in the foothills of Melton Mowbray. And remember: don't count your chickens as I like mine deep fried   A SOL News Production Images of cheese by digitalart